Eighteen years ago a little boy walked into my 1st grade classroom and told me his cousin had died. He was devastated and this was one problem I couldn’t fix. We talked, he cried, we talked some more, we both cried. I was thankful he trusted me with his broken heart, but I remember feeling completely and utterly helpless. Not being sure if my words and time were at all comforting, I looked for books about grief for children - there were a few, but they all had one thing in common - by the end of the story everything was all better, just fine, end of problem. Well, that’s not how it is, that’s not how it feels, so I began writing my own book.
The First Summer is a picture book; it’s been a long, sometimes painful, mostly joyful journey. My first draft came easily. Jack had lost his grandfather, and the first summer at their home on the shore without him was difficult. Other than the usual revisions, I thought it seemed to be just what was needed. But life happened. The weeks flew by, and somehow weeks and months became years. Then I lost my father. The story waited patiently for me to return. Suddenly, I wasn’t imagining how it felt … I knew how it felt and that changed everything. I needed to start again.
And so it went for years. The story was never quite right. Each time I lost someone dear to me, a whole new perspective presented itself and the story grew. Jack gradually became a real live character, with a heart that was broken and filled with questions… just like mine.
I have found with the other books I have written, that I could go on forever revising and tweaking, but at some point you have to wave the white flag and say, “It’s finished.” I waved the white flag and began to work with my friend and colleague, Beth Aschbacher, as we collaborated on the illustrations.
How she was able to create images from my words, I’ll never know, but she did. Jack became a real boy. We talked as if he were sitting there sharing how he felt, correcting us if we moved in the wrong direction, or smiling if we got it right.
Beth breathed life into each illustration with graphite lines and subtle color, but it was her belief in the healing power of words, time, and love that truly “finished” the book. I was sure of this when I read a message she sent me shortly after her long summer of illustrating was complete.
She wrote: ‘I miss Jack because I can’t look forward to watching him grow and change. He will never know us as you and I have known him. Jack is the first fictional child that I have ever been a part of creating. And although Jack served an important role and purpose to tell your story, I awoke early each day for almost two months to find him in my studio, at my table, motivating me. I molded his face first in my mind, then with my pencils. I felt his sadness, struggle and discovery so deeply. He was so close to real.’
Her words convinced me that our project was well worth the wait. It took eighteen years of living to pry open a grieving heart. The pain, the emotion, the time, the patience and the love it takes to find an ounce of peace when you’re faced with loss, is immeasurable. And with that peace comes hope, the most powerful balm of all.
It is not quite the light-hearted books I have written in recent years about leprechauns or animal friends, but it is a story that is needed. It's not a "problem solved...everything's fine" kind of ending, but it is indeed hopeful. My fondest wish is that it may help those whose hearts are hurting, to find some peace. Appropriate for ages 7 and older- yes, even adults will take something away from this story. The First Summer may be especially helpful used as a shared reading or discussion starter with Social Workers, Counselors, Life Transition Centers, and of course, families.
Meet the Illustrator
Beth Aschbacher earned her bachelor’s degree in studio art at Nazareth College of Rochester, and went on to earn her Master’s in art education from State University College at Buffalo. As a past (and current) Western New York resident, and art teacher in Buffalo, New York, she spent studio time as a free-lance illustrator, while raising her three children. Like Jack in The First Summer, she spent childhood summers in New England. It is there she watched her father sketch and paint directly from the rocky Atlantic shorelines. His landscapes and seascapes, along with her mother's portraits, continually served to inspire her as she developed her own style as an illustrator.
During her teaching career at an elementary school in Williamsville, Beth had an opportunity to watch creative minds and hands at work; she hopes she encouraged and inspired them each day! She and Sandy were colleagues as well as friends. Soon after Sandy’s retirement, they began work on The First Summer.
The First Summer has provided both the challenge and opportunity to fulfill Beth’s lifelong dream of illustrating a children’s book. Their close collaboration throughout the process enabled Beth to create drawings that brought Sandy’s ideas and detailed visions to life. The illustrations in this book were drawn by hand with graphite and color pencil.
Reader Reviews
… it's a book about grieving. I think it's important that we have books for kids about tough topics. But it's also a book about family, about friendship, and most of all about helping people through tough times. The book is beautifully written and illustrated. It's a story with substance.
… here again, it defies easy categorization. Is it a kid's book or does it have important things to say to a larger audience? I would argue for the latter. I think parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, mentors - anyone who cares about kids and knows kids they care about will find something of value here.
It has been 9 years since the loss of my father, and I still struggle with it and how to explain loss to my children. The First Summer helped me not only unleash my own feelings but helped me talk to my own children about grieving. I loved the beautifully drawn pictures and the way the words tapped on my heart. I thank the author and the illustrator for the beautiful gift of this book. I have bought several copies to give as gifts to help others in their grieving process. Wonderful, wonderful story!